Harassment Over Phone. What Needs To Be Done?


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Guys. Since TAI is extended family for me, I think I can discuss it out here. As you all know, my job requires me staying away from home for quite some time.
Well thats manageable till everything is fine back at home.
But off late, some ******* has been harassing my wife by making calls and SMSes. Now I am worried for my wife and kid. Now, what needs to be done in this case. How can I trace the caller? Please help.
 

Vishwas

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Oh this is a serious issue to look upon, i guess someone is closely watching your family's steps. At first report it to the police no matter what they do or not, and ask your telephone operator to trace the caller and tell them your problem, they might help you probably.
You have relatives over here?
 

TSIVipul

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Guys. Since TAI is extended family for me, I think I can discuss it out here. As you all know, my job requires me staying away from home for quite some time.
Well thats manageable till everything is fine back at home.
But off late, some ******* has been harassing my wife by making calls and SMSes. Now I am worried for my wife and kid. Now, what needs to be done in this case. How can I trace the caller? Please help.
See my buddy, this is a very serious issue these days, people keep on stalking women on phone, in market...anywhere.
  • First question is that, when it all started?
  • How many callers and numbers are there?

Actually, such issues occur either if the contact number is shared by any person known to you with some guys or from some market etc etc. Rest you can ask madam if she has given her number to anyone for some work, there are chances that any of such guys has leaked the number in public.

BEST REMEDY: Get the contact number changed if there are more than one callers.

Another way: Talk to any relative of yours and file an FIR, the FIR will state the matter of eve-teasing(Chhed-Chaad over phone or say harassment). Now all you need is one relative or friend with good contacts and who can easily deal with legal matters else the 'THANEDAAR' himself won't hear your wife easily. After that the call will be traced, address will be taken and action.
But since half of the numbers, especially such numbers run on FARZI IDs hence, it's also tough to track the caller that easily. Now in case, the caller is caught then okay and if not then best will be to get a new cell no. Now if the caller gets new cell no. too, the someone close to you people is behind all this.

How I dealt with one such case?
Sister of a friend was being stalked on phone by some guy and when I came to know about it, the simple steps followed by us were:
  • We asked the girl to start talking with the guy. In fact to sweet talk the guy.
  • After about 3-4 days of talking, we knew that the guy may be following the girl or will try to meet her.
  • After about 1 week, the girl called the guy for meeting at a mall but he rejected and told that he will meet her somewhere surprisingly.
  • On the next day itself, the guy stopped the girl on her way to college but never knew that friends of her brother are following and after that slaps and punches were flying in the air. Then the guy was handed to police, his parents were called to police station and were insulted very badly. MATTER SOLVED...
 
Thread Starter #4
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Yes I have few relatives in Bangalore. And they have been informed. But they cant be there all the time. The person does keeps track of my family movements. Evident from his messages. Anyways, I desperately feel like going back home, and get hold of this person.
I have informed local police station about this. Telephone operator wont take any action unless I have a copy of FIR. Well, the situation is under control. But we are so vulnerable. An unknown person can screw our peace and happiness so easily. They are nothing but a burden to the society.

Thanks Vipul.
The number might have leaked out while recharging phone or at a nearby supermarket. I have asked my brother to get a new number today itself.
I haven't yet lodged a FIR yet. But I have informed the police station nearby and asked them what is the best thing to do. I know the incharge over there. And its true, the number would wither be stolen or under some fake name.
A fair number of my family members are present in Bangalore (cousins and more cousins) who are either in college or working. We're trying to find means to find the guy before the number gets deactivated. Though the option of changing the SIM card is best, and that will be done, I too would like to deal the case as you did. Just waiting for my relief from ship.

I didnt answer your questions.

It all started with SMS from a Karnataka registered Airtel number. When my wife told me about this, I asked my brother. He gave few sweet calls to him and it stopped. This time only SMS.
Now, few days back, it started again, but from a different number (Karnataka registered Airtel number). ANd the guy tried to call and talk. My brother recieved one of the calls. The guy seems to be in 30-40, and is definitely from vicinity only. He knows that I am out of town.
 
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TSIVipul

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Thanks Vipul.
The number might have leaked out while recharging phone or at a nearby supermarket. I have asked my brother to get a new number today itself.
I haven't yet lodged a FIR yet. But I have informed the police station nearby and asked them what is the best thing to do. I know the incharge over there. And its true, the number would wither be stolen or under some fake name.
A fair number of my family members are present in Bangalore (cousins and more cousins) who are either in college or working. We're trying to find means to find the guy before the number gets deactivated. Though the option of changing the SIM card is best, and that will be done, I too would like to deal the case as you did. Just waiting for my relief from ship.
See buddy, I'd recommend you to get a post paid sim for madam this time. It helps a lot in any case, no chances of number leakage etc etc and whatever complain you make to customer care is considered at the moment. Call records of prepaid numbers are also not completely available may times.

Okay, if you know the incharge then all what you people need to do is:
  • File the FIR and ask the incharge to visit the company office himself, don't send anyone else.
  • Now get the address and raid it either in the morning or in the night, that also after confirming that number is in the area itself.
  • If you have relatives like college going guys and all then it's best to send them there and give the person a very good beating or say a lesson.
  • IF THE PERSON IS TRACKING THE MOVEMENTS OF YOUR FAMILY THEN FIRST THING YOU NEED TO DO IS TO ASK ANY RELATIVE TO ACCOMPANY YOUR FAMILY WHEREVER THEY GO, and by keeping a close watch you people can even track who the person can be.
 

Vishwas

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[*]If you have relatives like college going guys and all then it's best to send them there and give the person a very good beating or say a lesson.
This will just add up to complications, never try these.

[*]IF THE PERSON IS TRACKING THE MOVEMENTS OF YOUR FAMILY THEN FIRST THING YOU NEED TO DO IS TO ASK ANY RELATIVE TO ACCOMPANY YOUR FAMILY WHEREVER THEY GO, and by keeping a close watch you people can even track who the person can be.
[/LIST]
Strongly recommended.
 
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Well its matter of Head Vs Heart. While the heart says go get that bugger, head says take steps which wont backfire.
It is a serious problem for people who are always on move and there family is alone, most of the time, even for the rest of the people. Such stalkers need to be dealt with seriously. But its always better if such situation has not arisen at the first place itself.
1. never disclose your personal number anywhere. Things which you might feel harmless might be the culprit too. Like, filling a contest form in a mall, giving phone number to home delivery guys, writing name and phone number in customer feedback books in shops, etc.
2. If prepaid number, try to do online recharge only. top ups at a shop will need your number to be filled up there. Better alternative is to have a postpaid number. i am going to get that done for me.
 
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Nozzlering,

It is better to lodge a complaint at your nearest Police Station and inform them all the numbers which send those unwanted SMSs and from which calls are originating.

Now a days, Police in big Cities are taking these issues seriously.

Police can investigate the complaint under IT act (Information Technology act), various IPC sections and TR act (Telecom)

It is likely that you get quick relief.
 
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Same thing happened with my family when I was in school. Some one used to call my mom. Best thing was to lodge a complaint with Police and Police does take care of everything. And also your phone company will trace the call only if Police asks them to do so. Everything will be sorted . don't worry. Just lodge a complaint.
 
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@Nozzle

Sorry to hear this my friend.

Yes I faced similar situation 2 years back, but tracing the person was not that easy as they keep changing numbers and were with fake ID's, hence I have changed my wife's number and ensured that it is only known to relatives and her friends. If there is a need that if have to give phone number of residence I will give my number. So first thing don't worry and do not get panic and do the following

1. A complaint with cyber crime department of police will help. Lodge a FIR with them and ask them to trace that out, but for that again like vipul said if your wifes number should be a postpaid one so that the operator will keep a track on that number and tell us from where the calls are being received. And I feel at times, if that fellow does a simple mistake of not changing the SIM for long time, then he can be caught. To do all this see that one of your cousin are relative spend their time on this issue and see that they accompany your wife wherever she goes.

Second thing is like vipul said change the number and take a postpaid connection and keep the number secret for some time at least till you are back home.

I very well understand your feelings being away from home, that was the same situation when I was on extensive travel those days, but believe me don't worry, things will be alright soon !!

One more thing, first tell your wife to be brave enough and there is no need to get panic if such call comes and no need to speak soft, just ask her to bash that fellow and threaten him saying that police vigilance is already started and he will be caught very soon !! this really works
 
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TSIVipul

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This will just add up to complications, never try these.
Vishwas sir, sorry for standing against you but I am intact at my point.
These are not the people who hear your words, they understand only one language and they understand it very well too. Okay, you need not to hit the person with your hands, you have legal hands for that.(I can explain it all very well, only via PM if anyone needs such advises)

@Nozzle

Sorry to hear this my friend.

Yes I faced similar situation 2 years back, but tracing the person was not that easy as they keep changing numbers and were with fake ID's, hence I have changed my wife's number and ensured that it is only known to relatives and her friends. If there is a need that if have to give phone number of residence I will give my number. So first thing don't worry and do not get panic and do the following

1. A complaint with cyber crime department of police will help. Lodge a FIR with them and ask them to trace that out, but for that again like vipul said if your wifes number should be a postpaid one so that the operator will keep a track on that number and tell us from where the calls are being received. And I feel at times, if that fellow does a simple mistake of not changing the SIM for long time, then he can be caught. To do all this see that one of your cousin are relative spend their time on this issue and see that they accompany your wife wherever she goes.
BTW, if I'd have been in place of Nozzle sir, then I'd have asked my wife to act like nothing has happened and asked her to take cousins etc on shopping visits etc but not always. I have heard two types of such cases:
  • When the person just calls.
  • When the person also tracks you.
The second case is which is being talked here and this one is very much complicated too. The person who is disturbing madam is not an-another-guy, instead someone who knows that her husband is out and she lives with her kid, also he knows where she lives and may be knowing a lot more which means he will easily understand that you people have started taking precautions and this will just make him understand that he may get caught. These are psycho people, the person is not like we people, he knows that the lady he is following is a married woman with a child and only either a psycho or an aged psycho is expected to do such acts. Now since he keeps track of when she is going out or not, that means he is keeping an eye on her and hence most important is to be alert when she is alone at home and not to go anywhere taking the car all alone. Rest, if she will act like nothing has happened then it will make him confident to approach her and this is where he can be easily caught.

Second thing is like vipul said change the number and take a postpaid connection and keep the number secret for some time at least till you are back home.
Buy a new number and see if the caller gets this number too, if he gets this number too then that means you need to first of all have a look at your close friends, relatives etc etc.
BTW, if only a 500 Rs SIM can do it all, then you can be happy because this is a very small amount for peace of mind.

I very well understand your feelings being away from home, that was the same situation when I was on extensive travel those days, but believe me don't worry, things will be alright soon !!
These situations are very common for us, in fact for every guy or girl of our age who are committed to someone. I myself have many times got some calls asking me to forget the girl and same way she has changed her number twice in last two years and I myself have met 4-5 guys only because they were stalking her. But yes, there is a difference between the situation of we people and the one mentioned here.

One more thing, first tell your wife to be brave enough and there is no need to get panic if such call comes and no need to speak soft, just ask her to bash that fellow and threaten him saying that police vigilance is already started and he will be caught very soon !! this really works
I won't recommend this at all, he must not know that police vigilance is going on because buying a new SIM is very easy. Instead ask your wife to just ask him not to do such acts etc etc and threaten him saying that when you will be back you will see him etc etc.
BUT IT'S BETTER IF POLICE ETC IS NOT TALKED..if you people wanna catch the person then my buddy your wife herself is the main bridge and hence she is needed to keep her cool and then try to get the person trapped and that also with sweetness.
 
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Right now, ship's phone is not working and internet is the only means of communication for me. And then this problem! I was so much tensed. Talking to you guys made me feel a bit relaxed. Thank you all.
 

zengetz

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Do you live in flats ? If yes, then the culprit could be a neighbor who knows precisely when you are not around.

Please refrain from asking your wife to verbally confront the caller. This will just give her a lot of stress and reasons to lose peace of mind. Its easier said and done to play hardball but its better avoided.

I know this is a stressful situation but your immediate plan of action is to eliminate the
unnecessary calls by changing the number immediately. Period!

Get 2-3 New numbers if you really want to find out who the ***** is Give out the three numbers in three frequently contacted circles - Family, Friends/Neighbors, Other local purposes like the shop you frequent.

Once you know which number again the guy gets hold of, its easier to zero in with the same exercise ;)

Please call me when you get hold of him, I'll be glad to borrow my buddy's baseball bat.

The person who is harassing is taking advantage of you not being around and times his actions only then. He will only resort to these tricks and will not take his step forward. So now that the number is changed, he will frantically try to source the new number if he decides not to give up.

OT for everyone reading this.

What ever number you get if you do not wish to get junk calls and messages, make sure you register it with the TRAI's Do not disturb this is a very effective service and registration is just simple you may check online its just a matter of sending an SMS.

You will see that the number of unsolicited messages you get will be ZERO.
 
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Hi Nozzlering, As most of members have said I think you should do the following:
1) Register FIR with Police. Even if nothing happens you will have proof of when the harassment started. Also this is the starting point if you want your operator to investigate it further.
2) Ask your operator to investigate the matter further and get you/Police the details of the number. However this is considering that the person making the calls is using their own phone. In many cases, it is the phone recharge shop that is hand and glove with the culprit. They use a number they know cant be traced to them.
3) Get a android phone. The latest one have a number blacklisting feature. Black list the number after you receive it once. Hence you will not have to change to a new number and the miscreant will get the message. If he changes his number, black list the new number too.
I think number 3 would be able to solve the harassment you are currently facing. Hope it helps.
 
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