How To Say "No" To Your Good Friends?


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D.J.D.

D.J.D.

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I need some serious suggestion. Actually we a group of 4 friends along with family members are planning to make a trip to kodaikanal in August end. Everybody have their own cars. But my 3 friends are suggesting that we can take only two cars for 4 families because each family is having only 3 members i.e. parents and one kid. But me and my family want to enjoy the drive alone in our new ecosport. Now my problem is how to convince my friends without hurting their feelings . Please give your suggestions.
 
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AppU

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Just tell them that you have an important meeting at office or you want to visit your relation who is sick.

After escaped from the group, make sure you are not visiting the same place, where your friends going:-P
 
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Raja

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D.J.D. said:
Friends
I need some serious suggestion. Actually we a group of 4 friends along with family members are planning to make a trip to kodaikanal in August end. Everybody have their own cars. But my 3 friends are suggesting that we can take only two cars for 4 families because each family is having only 3 members i.e. parents and one kid. But me and my family want to enjoy the drive alone in our new ecosport. Now my problem is how to convince my friends without hurting their feelings . Please give your suggestions.
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Hi ,

first understand saying " NO" is not being selfish , or disrespectful , or being insensitive or it does not equate to hurting somebody's feelings .

Saying " NO " is being sincere to yourself and others around you , and also accepting and understanding your own limitations at times when it comes to please others . And respecting your own priorities too . And making your friends understand your priorities and limitations at times .

If you trying to be nice to others at the expense of your own happiness you won't make them or yourself happy . So its a lose lose situation for both parties involved .

Be honest and tell them the truth that why you want to travel with your family alone this time atleast , since its a new car and you had promised that privacy to your wife and kids , your friends won't mind atall. Because if they are your true friends since they will respect your choice and privacy .

If they feel bad or mind it then you will atleast get a glimpse of what to expect from them in future .

So saying no is a actually a win win situation for you . [:)]
 
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Gurrala74

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DJD,

I follow this most of the times

"Don't say YES when you want to say NO ; Don't say NO when you want to say YES"

Yes at times it looks bit difficult to follow this but it avoids confusions[:)]
 
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Tell them the truth why do not want to tag with others. Truthfulness and trustfulness is very important among friends.
Again I am telling do not take the help of lies. It will create a lot of problem in coming days.
They may feel bad for a moment ,due to some planning going different way, but after sometime things will be very nice.
 
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dharmesh

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Friendship is the only relationship that keeps on going on without any expectations.

It is difficult to say NO many times. But there is no point in saying YES to thing which you cannot enjoy. Be truthful to them and yourself and tell them what is the case. It may be very much possible that they don't mind at all. [:D] And take everything casually and lightly.
 
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nozzlering

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The problem is that all the friends are married. And when women are involved, things are not that simple.[evil] Definitely friends wont mind if he says NO. But at the same time, wives are gonna influence. I can understand DJDs dillema. [confused]In any case tell them the truth. As raja said, you'll atleast get a glimpse of what to expect in future.
 
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J

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nozzlering said:
The problem is that all the friends are married. And when women are involved, things are not that simple.[evil] Definitely friends wont mind if he says NO. But at the same time, wives are gonna influence. I can understand DJDs dillema. [confused]In any case tell them the truth. As raja said, you'll atleast get a glimpse of what to expect in future.
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Right on. It's 'bad' situation :)
Yes, better to tell the truth in a straight forward manner. Expect some strains in the relations and in worst case losing one or both friendships.
Good luck.
 
Thread Starter #10
D.J.D.

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nozzlering said:
If they are GOOD friends, just say N
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yes they are really my good friends. hope they will understand :)

AppU said:
Just tell them that you have an important meeting at office or you want to visit your relation who is sick.
Click to expand...
Hi appu i cant do this. Because we have made this plan one month ago and already booked hotels :) and it was our plan to go to a common place.


Raja said:
Hi ,

first understand saying " NO" is not being selfish , or disrespectful , or being insensitive or it does not equate to hurting somebody's feelings .
Click to expand...
Hi Raja i really appreciate your words. Thanks a ton. I will do as you said. Hope they will understand.


Gurrala74 said:
DJD,

I follow this most of the times

"Don't say YES when you want to say NO ; ]
Click to expand...
100% true.

amit1km said:
Tell them the truth why do not want to tag with others. Truthfulness and trustfulness is
Click to expand...
dharmesh said:
Friendship is the only relationship that keeps on going on without any expectations.
Click to expand...
nozzlering said:
The problem is that all the friends are married. And when women are involved, thing
Click to expand...
thank you for your kind words friends. I will tell them the truth. Hope they won't mind and our friendship will continue without any hard feelings.
 
Thread Starter #11
D.J.D.

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as you said i have explained my situation to my group and they din't mind. pheew now i am really feeling good. They are really my good friends [:D] and once agin thank you all for your kind words.

BTW tomorrow early morning we are leaving for kodaikanal. I am really excited to enjoy the drive with my cute devil
 
#14
codename47

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I am sort of person who never says no to anyone
but at the same time am too straight forward. If am busy and got some plans ,I'd say no to anyone

its doesn't feel bad when you say no to someone , its actually better then saying yes and not turning up for that
 
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vaibhav

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They are good friends right , then whats the prob ? Good friends understand things even by the tone or sometimes even without saying a word.
These are petty things
 
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